Letters I Wish I'd Sent. Part I.

Dear fellow driver,

If the lane in which I am traveling becomes suddenly obstructed by improperly parked vehicles, I will be merging into your lane--and signaling same by my use of my car's left blinker.

If my car is ahead of yours when said merge occurs, a high probability exists that I will be cutting you off. However, assuming you are observing the posted 25 MPH speed limit, and paying proper attention to ambient road conditions, this should pose no problem for you.

Before you decide to pull up alongside me at the next light, and commence screaming and cursing like the crazy person you appear to be, I suggest you keep in mind the following three points.

 # 1.I did not "almost hit you".
# 2. Almost only counts in horseshoes anyway.
# 3. Had there been an actual collision in which the front of your car impacted the rear of mine, that would have been you hitting me.

That's okay--I'll let it go this time.

Since out here in "the real world" (as opposed to the virtual world where you are, possibly, more used to driving) no such accident occurred (ie nothing happened!) I suggest you make an immediate appointment with your physician, as you may need to have your meds adjusted.

Have a nice day.